Apologies to Anyone Still Reading...

Hello.

I haven't posted in a while (yes, I am aware of this). It'll all be made clear within the next few days, I'm hoping to get stuff up within that timeframe. I miss and love you all, take care!

Day 11 - God Moves

I didn’t end up doing a whole lot of new and interesting things today, but some big things happened anyway.

I left home at about 1 for Capitol Hill. Got Vivace. Sat and read for a while. Went to Urban. Drove home. Read at home. Left again to go see if I could bike the Velodrome; it was open this time. I biked it for about a half hour. It was pretty sweet, took some getting used to though. The first time you ride up those huge banks it for sure feels like you’re gonna fall, the physics do not feel right at all - but sure enough, somehow I’d make it through every time. There were about 15 other people riding with me, but that’s a lot more than it sounds like - all the other people were serious racers practicing, so they were all decked out in full racing gear, riding their $5000 pro track bikes (clipped in of course) at about 30 mph through the inside lane, so I had to be pretty alert at all times. I stuck out like a sore thumb too, as I was the only one with bright green riser handlebars, sporting cutoffs and a t-shirt to boot, but I didn’t mind. I’m at least glad I can say I’ve done it, it was definitely a unique thing. I came home, had dinner, and watched the Cavs lose game 4 to the Magic - a sad affair, but if you were watching that series you had to have seen that one coming. Oh well, it’s still not the one that matters! (not gonna go on another Laker rave, fear not).

Like I said before, it was a pretty relaxed day; what made it stand out was that God actually spoke today. He has been slowly showing me a lot of the own darkness in my heart that I have either tried and failed to deal with in the past, or still feel bound to without even knowing it, despite God’s forgiveness and the Christ’s death on the cross... but today I feel like God really let me feel the weight and reality of that forgiveness again, and it was DEEPLY refreshing and PROFOUNDLY needed. Looking back on the past week or so, I can see now that a lot was building to this... which played a huge part in the deeper feeling or loneliness and darkness I have been feeling as each day has gone by (yep, haven’t really been writing on that much... now you know!). I haven’t intentionally tried to hide that, and I’ve really enjoyed my time so far despite it, but it was taking a toll on my mind, and would occur most commonly at the very end of each day when I was winding down. While I hate the darkness and I hate feeling lonely, I really think I needed to experience the weight of my own sin, to really stare it in the face, in order to grasp a little better the significance of my salvation... pretty big indeed. So, I thank God for what He’s graciously done in my heart, for following through like He promises to do (and always eventually does), and for continuing to bless me in ways I don’t merit AT ALL.

In other news, I’m going to Canada tomorrow! I have no idea what to expect, and am kind of stressing at the moment as I try to make a slight itinerary of some things I’d like to see while I’m there. That’s the last thing I’ve gotta face tonight, then it’s off to bed. Wish me luck in Maple Leaf country, eh? G’night!

Days 8-10, Getting Caught Up (Sorry!)

So, it’s Monday (or “day 10” as I’ve been counting) and I haven’t blogged in a while... i’ve just found it hard to recently I guess, not for any one reason, I’ve just been falling a little behind. I’m catching up tonight... starting with Saturday, the 23rd. I’m gonna post them separately...

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Day 8, Saturday, 5.23.09

I spent Saturday with my family here. It was a day they could all go out and do something, so I wanted to join them. We started by first going into Seattle, our destination: the Hiram M. Chittenden Locks. We saw some cool sights on the way as well. The locks were pretty sweet; it’s where they lower and raise the water level to let all kinds of ships go through to the next body of water.



There also is the fish ladders there (don’t ask me to explain that; all I know is that the fish swim backwards and it has to do with mating, look it up if you’re interested, that’s what wikipedia’s for). After that we headed to Freemont to see the troll. He was kind of a creeper (but cool).



His friend was too, we passed by this weird little guy on some street in Freemont



We walked around Freemont a bit, went to a high class organic chocolate shop call “Theo” (they have samples of almost all their chocolates there, and it’s all pretty amazing - pretty off the wall at times too, with flavors like “coconut curry” and chai). I really liked Freemont, it had its own cool little feel... pretty hippie, but really likable. We topped off the day with going to Anthony’s seafood restaurant, had really good seafood, then I finished my day with watching the second half of the Laker game - I almost had a heart attack, but we won in the end. Overall a really nice day.

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Day 9, Sunday, 5.24.09

On Sunday I played hookie - I decided to get an early start on a day in Seattle. I hadn’t spent a lot of time exploring there so I decided Sunday was the day. I left pretty early from the house and drove straight to my first destination: Capitol Hill. I lucked out with 3 hr parking right next to a park, got my bike out, and rode to Vivace, an espresso stand in the heart of the neighborhood. I got a latte... it was insanely good. The baristas do latte art on every hot drink, it’s a beautiful thing that adds a really special touch to the drink. I sat and read for a while, enjoying my drink. After I finished, I biked around the city for over an hour. I think that area has been my favorite yet. In one area is the hip busy vibe, then bike down a few blocks and hang a right and you hit nothing but beautiful, huge, classic homes. I rode up some big hills, found a cool park, explored, yada yada yada. After all that I went through downtown to the waterfront, scored some more premium free parking, and biked around. I got lunch at a little hot dog stand called Frankfurter’s... it was the best hot dog I’ve ever had in my life. Paired it with the freshest strawberry lemonade I’ve ever had in my life. Heaven.



I hopped on the ferry to Bainbridge Island, which was a pretty sweet experience because I got to ride my bike onto the ferry with all the cars. I got a tip from a local that I should check out a bike shop close to the dock on Bainbridge, so I did. It ended up being pretty much the only interesting thing on the island, but it was awesome. Tons of old historical track bikes, including the track bike used to set the *paced* land-speed record on bicycle in 1935, meaning he kept a certain speed for a mile... that speed being 81 mph. For a mile. On a freakin bicycle. I was awed. Here it is:



After that I caught the next ferry back & went home for the night, here's the last pic I took that day, it’s on the ferry headed back to Seattle:




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Day 10, Monday, 5.24.09

That brings me to today. I rested for a while in the morning and headed out at noon. I had a really similar day to yesterday, and it was just as nice. I hung around Freemont for a bit (rode my bike around this time), got lunch there, drove to gasworks park (which was a pretty sweet place, totally unique).





After that decided I needed coffee (GOOD coffee) so I headed to Capitol Hill. On my way there I drove through an area called “Queen Anne Hill”. It was basically just a HUGE hill in the middle of Seattle, where a lot of the old money lives. I didn’t know where I was going so I just took whichever turn headed me upward at every stop. It was an incredible view! From there I made my way to Vivace in Capitol Hill for round 2. The iced mocha was incredible. Relaxed there for a bit, then headed to the waterfront; I wanted to venture through a little place I’d only previously driven through, called Pioneer Square. Scored with MORE free all day parking, and rode my bike to the area. This had to be my 3rd favorite area, which is still saying a lot of the others because I loved this place (#1 being Capitol Hill area and #2 being Freemont). I should do some research on it because it had such a classic feel, a lot like downtown Boston - really old buildings in beautiful condition, lots of trees & shade, statues throughout. I stopped into a huge toy store called Magic Mouse Toys, which is apparently somewhat of a landmark in Seattle. I bought something cool, not gonna give it away though in case I decide to try it out on some of you. After all that exploring I went home to watch the Laker game, which ended up being a huge disappointment that I don’t even want to comment on because I can feel my temperature rising already as its still very fresh... I’m ok though because we get to play at home on Wednesday, which will hopefully make a lot of difference. Overall take home value of the game for all you interested - never leave your child alone in the same room with a Denver fan if said child is not from Denver and/or a Nuggets fan. They’re downright evil people. And I strongly believe the Oscar needs to enter into the arena of professional basketball after the astounding performances I’ve witnessed from a few of the Denver players... those little Nugs sure can ACT! I hope there’s a reasonable amount Denver fans represented in L.A. this coming game so I can watch at least a few of them wet themselves in shame as Kobe leads his team to victory and makes them sincerely regret chanting “Kobe sucks!” on many occasions (which surely goes against all logic, as Kobe’s statistics in the past 4 games [not to mention his entire career] have been phenomenal, and stand up on their own). ANYWAY, all that to say I’m a little upset, but hopeful for game 5.

I’m turning in for the night, sorry to those of you who still read this, I’ve meant to be more regular so I don’t feel pressured to unload it all at once and just push through it (ha, pardon the Biological allusions)... but thanks to you who still do read, it gives it a purpose, makes me feel like I’m still somewhat a part of my community. I bid you all adieu, and leave you to simply bask in a photo of pure greatness embodied in a man. Goodnight.

Day 6 & 7, Thursday (5.21) & Friday (5.22)

So... Day 6 wasn’t very eventful, so I decided to wait and just write about the last 2 days (thurs, day 6 & yesterday, day 7).

Day 6 I just pretty much hung out here (at the house) and read the whole day, finishing the day with watching the Lakers, which was a good game, but they lost :/

Yesterday was a good day. I woke up and started with writing some and just relaxing. At around 10:30am I left with my aunt Natalie & got a tour of the area around their house. We drove all the way around the lake pretty much, it was a really pretty drive (the weather was absolutely perfect too). We then headed to Microsoft where my uncle Nobuya works (shoot, I forgot his title... I just know he’s in development... as in he’s worked on the last bunch of editions of Microsoft Word & Office that have come out, he’s a pretty brilliant guy. He showed us around the whole area, it was pretty mind-blowing - it felt like a colony! So many huge office buildings, soccer fields, little mini nature centers, a huge mall-like complex with a massive food court, cell phone stores, bike shops, etc etc... this was all part of Microsoft! Everywhere you went in the buildings there were vending machines full of FREE drinks... now that was something that stuck with me! We went into the Microsoft museum at the end and that was pretty amazing too - took you through the history of inventions Microsoft has been responsible for, and demoed some new products (search “Microsoft Surface” online... it was pretty insane). At the very end, there was something that would take your picture and allow you to rearrange floating words into a sentence, then your picture and sentence were sent into the screen on another wall to connect with other people who’ve done the same thing there... I didn’t take it seriously of course (was surprised a lot of people seemed to though!), and my sentence was just close enough to standard English to make someone look again, and my face just normal enough to make you wonder if I was pulling it or just in fact grotesquely ugly... anyway, here it is



Oh, and I was so pumped about this... look who it is in the bottom left... the man behind the magic himself (and a stud to boot!).



After that, we left Microsoft, I got to tour some more of Redmond and the area surrounding. We got coffee at a little hippie shop called Victor’s, it was really good. We picked up George & Miya (cousins), and went to a place so magnificent it needs proper documentation... XXX Rootbeer! It was apparently a landmark in the area, and I couldn’t imagine why (there was a 50 ft barrel atop the shop with “XXX” inscribed on it in raised letters). I ordered a big rootbeer float (there was “big” and “bigger”, and seeing as how the big size was already a pint & a half, I thought I’d be more than fine). Anyway, here’s before and after, just to prove I actually did it:





After destroying my insides with that monstrosity, I went inside to take some pictures. It was so oddly (yet cooly) decorated, I had to get some of it down.





We got home, I rested for a little, then headed back by myself to a location we had just stopped by earlier in the day, one that I didn’t mention yet: the VELODROME. It’s an angled track for professionally racing bikes, specifically track bikes (a.k.a. fixed gears, a.k.a. what I ride!). I had gone back this time since earlier I hadn’t brought my bike, but when I got to the track I saw to my dismay that there were races going on. I took a few pictures just to show what it was like.



I rode around the trail in the park for a little, then went back home again (I think I’m gonna go back today to try and ride it, there aren’t any races scheduled). I caught the end of the Cavs/Magic game, which ended up being the 2nd best finish to a basketball game I’ve ever seen... Cavs had blown a 20 point lead, Magic got ahead by 2 with 1 second left in the game, so Cavs were set to throw it in downcourt... Mo Williams finally finds LeBron, who turns and jumps as soon as he grabs the ball, throws up a half/blind prayer of a 3, and sinks the game winning buzzer beater... it was beautiful, I got some serious chills watching it! Anyway, just relaxed a bit that night, and here I am, about to venture into Seattle with the family for a while. I hope all is well back home, I miss you all!

Day 5, Wednesday, 5.20.09

[WARNING: this one's long, I apologize, it's way more than I expected it to be. It's also got some good stuff in it though. If you decide to go ahead and read it, I hope you enjoy it.]

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A lot has been going on between yesterday and right now, so I’m just now getting to write (it's Thursday, just now writing about yesterday). I have a lot of reading and reflection I want to do today, so I’m just more going to write for the sake of documenting what I did yesterday (day 5)...

I woke up and wrote for a little, relaxed, and finally left around one o’clock. My destination: Snoqualmie Falls. It was apparently a mini Niagara (divided by about 100 width-wise). The drive there was really pretty.



I parked, brought out all my camera stuff, and walked to the observation deck. It was beautiful, gave me pause when I looked at it. I took some pictures. There was a trail to the base of the falls, about a mile (each way) so I decided to check it out. The weather was overcast but not super gloomy, really good for photography. Everything was so green and so pretty, I took a bunch of pictures [here are a few just to give you an idea]





At the base there was another observation deck about 50 ft from the ground, and the view wasn’t super cool. A man appeared to my left from behind the wooden retaining wall of the platform, followed by about 4 other people. They had climbed the wall and descended the rocks to get a closer view of the falls. Sounded good to me. I did the same after they got up, it was kind of hard b/c I had a bag containing the camera and lens, and was holding a tripod in one hand. I made it though, and got pretty close to the falls. It was hard to get much because the spray was dotting up the lens and making it hard to get a clear image (mom or dad it you’re reading this, don’t worry, it wasn’t enough to hurt any of the equipment, and it wasn’t even dad’s lens anyway). Anyway, I got a couple weird shots that I didn’t really like, then tried to take a picture of me in front of the falls, and I looked incredibly goofy, so I tried to take another and actually liked it - this time I had tried to wipe down the lens and didn’t have much luck, so there’s this natural non-photshopped blur throughout the picture that makes it really obscure and sort of cool (sort of), so that’s why I’m posting it - the second in a series of odd self-portraits (you’ll see the third in a minute). Here it is:



After spending a while there, I drove the opposite way on the 90, heading toward Seattle. I figured ‘why not’ since I had a lot of the day left. As I entered downtown, a lot of things happened.

#1. I was blown away by how different it was than I had imagined. I had never actually been there, and I slowly realized I hadn’t even really seen a ton of pictures from there either, so I really was going in there the whole time not knowing really what it was going to be like. Leading to:

#2. My expectations / plans had to be reshaped. I thought I would be biking around this city, and that was swiftly done away with as I dove over each hill on my way down to the waterfront... it’s like freakin Indiana Jones - no, Splash Mountain, and then repeated every few streets. San Francisco was ‘riding a bike down your newly paved sidewalk with training wheels still attached’ compared to this... oh well, now I know [ha].

Needless to say I was a little taken aback. It was cool, I could for sure tell there was a TON of life to this place... it felt like one of those cities it’d take a long time to get to know. I parked somewhere (3rd and Vine) and walked a bit. I somehow found Pike Place Market. I walked through the upper level under the overhang (wow, I apologize for all the directional cues, I reread that and got a headache). An old, seemingly homeless African American man walked up to me and shook my hand. He muttered something about looking him in the face, and I noticed at once that he had only a left eye - his right was just the hole, and you could easily see all the way into it. Then he said something about ‘one-eyed, one-armed, one-legged man’... I looked slightly down, and realized that I was shaking the only arm he had. I looked down further, and realized he was a liar - he had two legs. After what seemed like a very long time standing there, shaking this man’s hand, he got down to business - “blah blah blah, blah blah, blah, and I’m just looking for something to eat, I need” - before he could continue, I said “I’m sorry man, all I have is cards. Take care” which was sort of true - I had my cards and a twenty - so I guess it was about as true as his idea of himself - he had one eye, one arm, but TWO legs, and I had one debit card, one credit card, AND $20 cash... so that was that. I continued down til it started smelling really bad, and realized they were selling fish. I saw a huge sign that read, “WELCOME. 3 Floors, Over 50 Shops to Serve You! DOWN UNDER”...



My aunt had told me about this place, and it had piqued my curiosity, so I went... DOWN UNDER. It was weird, kind of hard to explain, but I went the whole way, looked at all the shops, visited every floor, and took a couple photos. Here’s the 3rd weird self-portrait I was talking about, kind of sums up the feel of Down Under.



After ALL that adventure, I got home, had dinner with the fam, hung around, worked on some photos, talked bikes with my uncle (he has a sweet bike too), skyped Leigh & Natalie, then tried to get to bed. I couldn’t sleep. I was trying to talk to God and having a lot of difficulty. Earlier that day it had been a little easier - as I walked the trail down to the base of the falls I had talked to Him the whole way... no response, but at least I was talking. But now even that was hard. I was hit by about a million things at the same time... and it hurt. Loneliness, my inability to talk to God, the way I go to tangible things for comfort instead of God, my need to control certain things and situations, and the anxiety I face when I can’t, my discomfort with loneliness... I don’t know, it just made getting to sleep impossible... but I did eventually. This morning I woke up feeling a little differently, but still kind of confused / mixed up. I spent a few hours looking through old journal entries, and found some good stuff - documentation of when I was feeling almost EXACTLY like this, as well as my prayers I wrote down that went along with all that. I’m going to spend today reading, reflecting, praying, existing. If you read this [and congratulations for getting through it, I hadn’t meant for it to be such a long one!], pray that I would still seek despite the lack of response / initiative I’ve sensed on His part (I’m not mad at this, it’s just kind of how it’s felt). Pray that’d I’d also be able to see myself as He sees me; as loved, as forgiven, as whole. Thanks for the prayers and for reading, sorry this one was kind of a novel. Signing off.

[Day 4 Continued]

So I wanted to write more last night but was honestly just too tired, I needed to get to sleep. There were only 2 things I wanted to write about real quick, and they were the beginning of the drive and Portland.

First of all, Oregon is beautiful. Maybe a lot of you know this or assumed it, but I’ve never been here so it’s all new to me. I drove through the whole state, and though it changed from place to place, there is one constant to it all: the GREEN. No matter where you are, if you look on either side of you (you don’t even have to look, it’s blaring at you) you’ll find about a million trees in both directions. The South half of Oregon was more beautiful I thought, specifically going through “Canyonville”... it was insane, it was about an hour of driving through mountains, but not windy hills like you might think - it was long straightaways and curves going up and down on a 4 lane freeway. On either side were trees reading up 50 to 100 ft, and the road went up and down so much that it was really hard most of the time to know if you were climbing or descending (really disorienting actually). The air was unlike anything I’ve breathed anywhere else too. Here are a few pics from the drive, the first was in the heart of Canyonville and the second is right past it (forgive the quality, they’re through the front of my windshield as I was going 75/80 mph... they’ll give you an idea of what I’m talking about though).





I made it to Portland from Medford in just about 4 hours, which was really good time. I parked in the parking garage at Powell’s books in downtown, and went inside... that place is overwhelming! It’s 3 or 4 stories high, and each floor is packed with shelves, DENSELY packed, to the point that it almost feels like a maze. I wanted to get something there so I could remember it, so I bought Cannery Row by John Steinbeck, I’m gonna read it while I’m here. I rode my bike around downtown a bit and got to know the area a little, it was awesome, that place has such a cool feel.

From there it was a few more hours to my relatives’ house. In the last hundred miles or so I began to feel it - my head was starting to pound, I could feel myself getting REALLY anxious... 4 separate days of driving, ranging from 4 to 9 hours a day, will really get to you I think... getting out of that car at the house felt great, but my brain felt like it wasn’t all there, I felt like I was in the twilight zone. I feel a lot better this morning, and am still going to use today to rest and recover from the drive. Thanks to everybody who’s following along, it makes it feel worthwhile and helps me feel connected. I’m going to explore a little around this area, I’ll have more later.

Day 4, Tuesday, 5.19.08

What sort of human being combines such a random pair of items together as a vegetable called Cucumber and a fruit called Canteloupe? A genius? A very lucky man or woman who happened upon a glorious fluke? The world will never know, so I feel it’s best just to tip our hats to the mysterious individual who invented the scent “Cucumber Melon” and enjoy the wonderful gift they’ve given all of us. I’m finally clean today, freshly showered and smelling lovely (as you might have gathered), sitting in the basement [my room] of my aunt Natalie and uncle Nobuya’s house in Issaquah, which I was informed has officially changed to “Sammamish” (or “Sammich” as I like to call it). I’m feeling somewhat refreshed, but mainly just exhausted. I’m going to post only this short one tonight, I’ll write more tomorrow. All that to say, I’m safely at my destination, and I’m very thankful.

Here are the stats so far for the trip:

I’ve driven a total of 1279 miles, for 20+ hours (hard to track to due side adventures such as San Fran, Shasta, and Portland).

I’ve spent $191.10, with $114.78 of that going toward gas.

Anyway, there’s a quick little update, just to say I’m here safely. I plan to relax and recoup from the drive tomorrow, so I’ll most likely be hanging here most of the day. Goodnight, I’ll have more tomorrow.